Jen's Banana

Ding-Dong Ditching Haiti

2010-04-15T14:04:00.002-07:00

It has been almost a year since Andria and I were galavanting around Europe. Today, she sent me a text message that reminded me of how much has changed but certainly put a positive light on a very dark current event.

Our 24 hour stay in Florence was full of many incredible shenanigans, from Andria trying on a $300 leather jacket to being absolutely awestruck by David's... well, David... in his... massiveness. However, nothing was quite as hilarious as the evening when leaving the hostel, I mistook a doorbell for a lightswitch in the walkway and accidentally ding-dong ditched the Haitian Consulate. The two switches look exactly the same! Andria and I bolted away when we realized what I had done and never looked back.

Haiti has been associated with so much remorse and sorrow over the past few months. It is truly a relief to be reminded that I do have a positive memory of Haiti that brings the biggest smile and sometimes even chuckles.

Things That Make Me Happy: Nail Polish

2010-01-25T12:58:00.001-07:00

Specifically, nail polish in obnoxious colors that only take one coat.

Introducing: Sally Hansen's HD Nail Colors

I was a little apprehensive at first because one bottle of nail color for $6.00 (Walgreens) seemed a little steep. But I bought the yellow anyways and it was definitely worth it. One coat is all it took and the nail color looks the same as it does in the bottle. Absolutely excellent!

Check it out. It's amazing. :)

Is it Ethical to Vacation in Haiti Right Now?

2010-01-21T15:00:00.000-07:00

CNN's Article: Haiti Cruise Stops Draw Ire, Support

The question has been posed by many news outlets recently if it is ethical to vacation in Haiti following the fulfillment of a scheduled stop by cruiseline Royal Caribbean. The CNN Article above suports the continued stops because it stimulates the economy in that area. Comments by readers illustrate outrage against "flaunting your good fortune so close to death and despair".

My argument is in between the two. I don't think it's a question of ethics at all when it comes down to the actual "vacationing". It's a personal choice to go on a vacation and the location of the vacation. I feel it's more a question of comfortability. Do you feel comfortable vacationing on the same island as a recent natural disaster? I'm a firm believer in "To Each His Own". I do think that Haiti's continued tourist economy could use the help. Would I feel comfortable lying on a private sandy beach 100 miles from families being buried by the hundreds? Prooobably not.

I think the real question of ethics lies in the business of cruise lines. Royal Caribbean is working a cargo ship, bring supplies to the island as it ports. In addition, as stated by the article, they are donating proceeds to the disaster relief. But are they providing an out for their customers? Do customers who cancel because they are uncomfortable with proceding with a planned and paid-for cruise to the island get a refund? Or even a partial refund? Is the business staying ethical? I have no idea what the conditions are for reserving a cruise trip, if there are contingencies in the contract for natural disasters. Regardless, I feel that's the only question of ethics that belongs in this situation.

What are your thoughts?

6 Ways to Train Your Boyfriend

2010-01-20T00:09:00.005-07:00

6 Ways to Train Your Boyfriend

Posted using ShareThis

I came across this article online while discussing, quite extensively, with my boyfriend why women's magazines tend to be a little... biased and ridiculous. The article "6 Ways to Train Your Boyfriend" comes from the famed Cosmopolitan magazine, where I am sure it has been been rinsed, reused and recycled over the years as they have been known to do. My beef with this article is its cliche content and perpetuation of some seriously absurd gender stereotypes. The title alone says a mouthful. Ways to "train" your boyfriend. Really? As if they are dogs... or, as the article emphasizes, chimps. Really?! What I would like to know is, what does the guy think when he finds this issue on his lady friend's coffee table or tucked into her beach bag? Does he start second guessing all of her behaviors? "Is she 'training' me? Am I being manipulated?" Completely counterproductive to building a healthy, trusting relationship. In addition, what kind of example does this set for younger girls who happen to pick up the magazine? Sure, we all want to believe that in a perfect world young ladies under the age of 18 wouldn't dare get their hands on the magazine that consistently boast "99 New Ways to Wow Him in Bed" but let's be realistic. Articles such as these breed new generations of girls that end up on trashy reality tv, like "Rock of Love", because they spend much of their adult life trying to manipulate their way through the dating pool. Instead, why don't we encourage young women to communicate openly with their boyfriends? Men are pretty simple. Be a straight shooter. Don't play games. If you want him to take out the trash, ask the dude, like he's a human being, to take out the trash.

Jake Shimabukuro

2010-01-19T23:58:00.000-07:00

Recently, I've become acquainted with Jake Shimabukuro, a fantastic ukulele player who brings the instrument to a whole new level. This past weekend I thoroughly enjoyed the opportunity to see him at Phoenix's Orpheum Theatre. Take a moment to enjoy his version of "In My Life" by The Beatles.

Jake Shimabukuro's Official Website

Sooo Cute!

2009-12-03T11:20:00.003-07:00

See more funny videos and funny pictures at CollegeHumor.

Lake Havasu City to Close Middle School

2009-12-03T11:20:00.000-07:00

This is what happens when the majority of your voters are snowbirds and senior citizens who couldn't give a crap about the families of your community. I feel really sorry for the schools of Lake Havasu, and for the rest of the country for that matter. Where are our priorities? Closing an entire middle school, in a town with 6 crowded elementary school, 2 overflowing junior highs, and 1 busting at the seams high school... ??? Does this seem wrong to anyone else? And for what? So Widow Gray Hair who drives down to Lake Havasu in November and leaves in March doesn't have to pay higher taxes? Perhaps Granny shouldn't own two homes! It's shameful that citizens don't want to help out their communities and for that kids have to crammed into classrooms like sardines. In addition to that, the poor teachers get overwhelmed by the increased number of kids, assignments to grade and parents to deal with... all for very meager pay. It's disgusting. We sit here and tell our kids to "stay in school" - "education is important" - but really, what's their incentive if the community is forcing them into overcrowded classrooms where their specific challenges and talents are ignored because teachers are spread too thin. Ridiculous.

Today's News-Herald : News : School’s future in limbo : Havasunews.com : Serving Lake Havasu City & The Lower Colorado River Area

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Frowny Face

2009-12-01T14:00:00.002-07:00

see more Epic Fails

Taylor Swift's SNL Monologue

2009-11-08T23:47:00.001-07:00

Welcome to November

2009-11-02T14:28:00.000-07:00

This conversation was way too funny not to share.

********************
me: i have a really funny story for you

Andilynne: i'm on the edge of my rolly chair

me: So last night, around 10:15 I was getting home from Gammage. I carried all my shit from the weekend up the stairs... fiddled my keys around in my hand to get the apt key... went to put it in the lock... and the tip of the effing thing was bent. I'm talking... 45 degree angle

Andilynne: ....how?

me: No idea. It was not that way when I left to go to Chris's... my keys were on his counter the whole weekend... and then bam... bent key. So I'm like, "Shit...".... and so I put all my crap down and try to bend the key back into place........
SNAP
Then I said "FUCK!"

Andilynne: how did you get in?!?!

me: So I pull out my phone to call maintenance... and my phone goes "Out of Battery. Powering down."
And then I said, "really? like... really?!"

Andilynne: hahahahah..i'm cracking up soo bad right now
continue please...the mental images are amazing

me: So I decided to be ingenius and stuck the broken tip into the lock... and then the rest of my busted ass key... and it unlocked the door
I nearly pissed myself
I was like a really excited puppy
This morning I was able to lock my apt using the same method (because the tip was still stuck in there) and the phone call to maintenance was hilarious

Andilynne: oh my god!
that is soo funny
i can't believe that happened

me: ME EITHER! WTF!!!
It was so funny
So the maintenance guy just called me and he was like, "Is anyone home? Otherwise I have to break down the door." And then he started laughing!
So he's coming back at 3:30
because he obviously doesn't have the puzzle piece he needs to get in

Andilynne: hahahaha

me: It's like legends of the hidden temple
have to get the right key

Andilynne: that exactly what i was going to say!!!!!!!! the room of the kings or something!

me: Hahahahahaha
So ridiculous

This is my life

Awkward Facebook Moments

2009-10-09T18:19:00.001-07:00

4 Awkward Moments in Facebook "Likes" on CollegeHumor

Take the Stairs!

2009-10-09T18:00:00.001-07:00

Not Far from Tar and Feathering...

2009-09-24T13:22:00.003-07:00

I have continued to follow the story enclosed below for a few reasons. One, the act was atrocious - if, indeed, it was a homicide. Two, under any circumstances, it is never deemed appropriate to use another human being's body involuntarily to send a political message. And third, it is reminiscent of the American Revolution's hasty and overreactionary tactics of protesting the oppressive acts mandated by the British Parliament, particularly tar and feathering. Sure, let's use people who are employed by the government to have people fill out a survey as punching bags, or in this case, a billboard sign. As in history, the administrators of the Stamp Act were merely doing their job by enforcing the mandates enclosed in that act. In order to fulfill their duties, they did not commit harmful crimes, they did not trespass on to property, they did not in any way personally infringe upon the individual liberties of the members of the colonies. They were doing a job. If you don't want to fill out the census, while it is a crime, it is your discontent that you must own and not harmfully impose upon another human being in such a distructive manner. It's a damn piece of paper. A piece of paper, in fact, designed to gain the population of a state more representation in Congress so their voice is heard. Regardless of your feelings about the content you are being surveyed on in the census, it is not so invasive that a human being's life or fellow citizen's life should be spared to prove discontent. I can only hope that in the event this is determined a homicide the rash individual is brought to justice.

********************************
Census Worker Found Dead In Kentucky -- What Do We Know?
Zachary Roth
September 24, 2009, 2:54PM

Over the last 24 hours, we've been tracking a gruesome story developing involving the death of a Kentucky Census Bureau worker. The potential political implications of what happened are already generating a lot of attention around the internet -- so it's worth taking a moment to lay out what we know.

On September 12th, the body of Bill Sparkman, a 51-year old part-time Census worker and teacher was found in a remote area of the Daniel Boone National Forest, in Clay county, in rural southeast Kentucky. Sparkman reportedly had died on the morning of the day before.

According to an AP report published yesterday, the FBI is working with state police to determine whether this was a homicide, as is believed, and if so, whether it was motivated by anti-government sentiment. An anonymous law enforcement official told the AP that the man was found hanging from a tree with the word "fed" written on his chest. (The source didn't specify the instrument that had been used to write the word. MSNBC has said several times today that it was scrawled in marker, but has not sourced that information.) It's a federal crime to attack a federal worker because of his job, or while he's carrying it out.

The leak to the AP about the word "Fed" has sparked fevered speculation that Sparkman may have been murdered as an expression of anti-government -- and even specifically anti-Census -- sentiment, of the kind ginned up by conservatives of late. Rep. Michelle Bachmann (R-MN) said earlier this year that she would not fill fully out her census form, which is a crime.

But the motivation behind the killing -- if indeed it was a killing -- is not clear at this point.

A spokesman for the Kentucky police told TPMmuckraker last night that police were still looking into death, that an autopsy has been scheduled, and no cause of death has yet been listed.

And the commander of the state police post handling the case told the Lexington Herald-Leader today that the police hadn't confirmed it was a homicide. "There are too many unanswered questions for us to lean one way or the other," she said. "Every scenario is still on the table. We have not ruled this is a hate crime against a federal employee."

And an ABC News report suggests there could be more in play than raw anti-government feeling:

[S]ome people wonder if his death in the remote part of southeastern Kentucky known for its meth labs and hidden marijuana fields had less to do with his job than simply being in the wrong place at the wrong time.If that speculation were accurate, the "Fed" that may have been scrawled on Sparkman's chest could be intended as a warning by criminals to law enforcement to stay away, rather than as a pure expression of opposition to government -- though it may be hard to separate those two motivations entirely.

It's not even entirely clear what Sparkman was doing in the remote area. A Census official told the AP that her office was told Sparkman's truck was found nearby, with a computer he was using for work inside.

As for the dead man himself, Sparkman's mother, Henrie Sparkman, who lives in Florida, told the AP that Bill Sparkman had moved to Kentucky to be a local director for the Boy Scouts of America. He also worked as a substitute teacher.

Census officials told the AP that Sparkman had worked for the Census since 2003, in five Kentucky counties, including Clay county.

Henrie Sparkman also said that investigators had told her the body was decomposed, and it would be better for her son to be cremated.

She added to the AP that she didn't know what had been behind her son's death. "I have my own ideas, but I can't say them out loud. Not at this point," she said.

No one answered TPMmuckraker's call to a Florida number listed for her.

Commerce Secretary Gary Locke, whose department oversees the census, said in a statement:

We are deeply saddened by the loss of our co-worker. Our thoughts and prayers are with William Sparkman's son, other family and friends.

Locke called Sparkman "a shining example of the hardworking men and women employed by the Census Bureau."

Lakeland Florida Police caught playing Wii Bowling

2009-09-24T07:56:00.001-07:00

Lakeland Florida Police caught playing Wii Bowling: "

Lakeland Police playing Wii Bowling during a drug bust.

Author: drummerboy199

Added: September 22, 2009

"

Absolutely ridiculous. Do your job and get out.

University Of Calif. Faculty, Students To Walk Out

2009-09-23T23:32:00.000-07:00

University Of Calif. Faculty, Students To Walk Out: "

More than 1,000 faculty members and students at the University of California schools are planning to walk out Thursday in protest against an increase in tuition and furloughs. Joshua Clover, an associate professor of English at the University of California, Davis, says the moves instituted by the university system's administrators mean that students are getting less attention from their professors despite having to pay more for their education.

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I'm pretty proud of the UC system making a statement against tuition and furloughs. ASU has dealt with tuition hikes, furloughs AND a surcharge. Who knows if this will actually change anything but at least they're putting their foot down.

Evangelist Kirk Cameron Plans To Distribute Darwin's Origin Of The Species With Creationist Introduction

2009-09-23T14:54:00.000-07:00

Evangelist Kirk Cameron Plans To Distribute Darwin's Origin Of The Species With Creationist Introduction: "

Do you remember Kirk Cameron, former child star and current promoter of the banana-as-proof-of-God theory of evangelism?

Well, he's baaaack:

In a video posted recently to YouTube, Cameron lays out a plan to subvert 'Darwin Day' on November 22, 2009 -- a date marking the 150th anniversary of the publishing of Charles Darwin's 'Origin of Species.' Cameron says that he and like-minded activists plan to deliver 50,000 copies of an altered version of Darwin's book to students at dozens of U.S. universities.

Cameron explains that this 'very special' edition of the 'Origin of Species' will include an introduction explaining 'Adolf Hitler's undeniable connection' to the theory of evolution, and highlighting 'Darwin's racism' and 'his disdain for women.' Cameron's edition also exposes the 'many hoaxes' of evolutionary theory, while presenting a 'balanced view of Creationism.' (There's a pdf of this introduction here.)

Super classy guy, that Cameron. Tying Darwin to Hitler. And misogyny and racism. What, no pedophilia or necrophilia? A YouTuber who goes by the name ZOMGitsCriss responds to Cameron's plans:

WARNING: Strong language, not safe for work.

Confused about the Health Care Proposals???

2009-09-23T13:46:00.002-07:00

These sites really helped clarify things for me. Have a look.

CNN's Health Care Reform Proposals Explainer

Rock the Vote: Health Care

New York Times FAQ Sheet

Obama on Letterman

2009-09-23T09:08:00.003-07:00

Excellent Reponse.

Why So Serious?

2009-09-14T21:41:00.000-07:00

Click on it... now. Hahahaha

Why So Serious?

Change of Shade

2009-09-10T08:31:00.000-07:00

I finally took the big plunge. I have avoided dying my hair for three years after two years of addicted coloring. That was all changed yesterday with the spontaneous purchase of a box of dye at CVS and quick application before I could change my mind.

The Result: Love it!!!

President Obama's Education Pep Talk

2009-09-08T09:34:00.008-07:00

Today was meant to be a day where school kids were to tune into a speech given strictly for their benefit. President Obama had planned to give a speech to kindergarten through twelfth graders regarding their responsibility for their own education. But a week ago, a fiery debate started. Parents were concerned with the administrations plan to supply a supplementary lesson plan with the speech asking the students to write an essay focusing on what they would personally do to help the President. Parents all across the country believed this was a plan to indoctrinate the students of America. To rectify the situation, the administration withdrew their lesson plan, suggested that students write an essay about their personal education goals, and agreed to release the text of the speech on Labor Day for public review. With all these attempts to pacify the public, school districts still banned showing the speech to students until the speech was reviewed. Some districts even went as far as to increase security settings on teachers' in-class internet so they could not broadcast it via online video or audio.

There are quite a few fundamental issues with this. First, while I do agree that releasing a lesson plan asking the students to write about how they're going to "help the President" does sound a little...agenda-driven, with the release of the text, teachers, parents and school officials clearly would have realized that by "help the President" the administration meant to take control of their education, thus serving their nation - a point President Obama made repeatedly throughout his speech. It's all in the wording. The administration essentially didn't ask anything different the second time around, but somehow it made a difference.

Second, this is incredibly insulting to the OFFICE of the President of the United States. I do not believe the President should be able to say whatever he damn-well pleases to the impressionable youth of America or even to the citizens of the U.S. in general. We live in a country constantly wary of authority and power abuse. However, when the President of the United States wants to encourage your child to do better in school and take control of their future regardless of their circumstances, I have a really hard time understanding that.

On that note, let's talk about censoring the President. Where were all these angry people when President G. W. Bush gave any speech? For eight long years, my poor impressional brain was subjected to his incoherent ramblings about every topic on the planet. His speeches most definitely should have been screened and edited before aired... all for the sake of the public good. In President Obama's case, at the very least, your "impressional" second grader would be exposed to an excellent public speaker addressing issues directly relevant to their life at this moment. Your second grader would be instantly engaged in their country.

Third, the growing bi-partisan canyon in the is country is destroying the institutions we have prided ourselves on for 250 years. Such a blatant sign of disrespect to the President sends the wrong message to kids, teenagers and young adults all across America. I sure hope that my future, hypothetical children will still have dreams of becoming President even after all the respect has withered away and their power resembles that of the Queen of England - a symbolic figurehead.

The speech itself was one of the most inspiring speeches I've ever heard. Obviously its basis on a topic I am very passionate about lends to its positive attributes, but also President Obama successfully related to students on a personal level. His overall message that by taking responsibility for your education, you are also taking responsibility for your civic duty is incredibly empowering for students. It's something tangible that they can do now. They can do better on their test next week. They can study a half an hour longer each night this week. They can map out their educational goals tonight. By these little steps, they are serving their nation while their nation is serving them. It's a call to duty reminiscent of President Kennedy's "Ask not what your country can do for you - ask what you can do for your country." President Obama is guiding students down the path of what they can do for their country. This is definitely a message every child is entitled to hear. Democrat or Republican.

An excerpt from the speech...

For full text of President Obama's speech... Click Here.
For the news story... Click here.

Life in Solitude

2009-09-04T14:36:00.004-07:00

I've been avoiding my blog. Primarily because I feel guilty for not completely my European adventures synopses. I've decided everyone can just get over it. If you want to know stories, just ask me.

I now reside in my very own one bedroom apartment. Just me and the cat... *ahem*

It took me about a week and a half to shake the feeling of waiting for someone to get home. Whether or not it was conscious, I was always waiting to hear Andria get home before I actually settled in for the night. Now, I wait for no one. Now, I lock up the apartment as tight as possible and wiggle into bed with a bit of an uneasy tremble in my tummy. All in time.

Despite my camping chair living room furniture, things are coming together well. Thanks to the generous help of my family, I have a fully functional kitchen. I don't have anything on cinder blocks... so that's a plus. I'm almost fully unpacked... another plus.

Let's be honest and straight forward here. My whole "Yay! My Own First Place!!!" feeling was really overshadowed by the fact that my bank information was compromised. Somehow or another, some skeezy low-life made duplicates of my two Wells Fargo debit cards and one credit and ran about the Valley on a shopping spree. The crazy things is all of my cards were still in and have never been out of my possession. Shady. Thankfully, Wells Fargo Fraud Protection is amazing and caught it right away. While the dirtbag was able to charge about $500 to my accounts, I was able to get provisional credits so essentially I have my money back. However, that's pending a decision from investigations from the bank and police departments finding that I did not actually make those charges. That can take up to 90 days. Ugh.

My life is still a circus.

You could say my faith in institutions has been reaffirmed over the past weeks. My bank did the job they are hired to do - protect my money... and even more so, defend my integrity as an economic player. The police departments have handled my case with diligence and are keeping me posted on all information regarding my case. The utilities companies, credit card companies and loan companies have worked with me to give me reasonable extensions on my bills, even reducing the due amount temporarily until I get back on my feet. Amazing. Where there is dark... there is also light.

This event also reaffirmed my faith in the existence of some otherworldly, cosmic force. The context for this occurrence: it happened on a Thursday morning... I was moving into my new place on Friday morning... and starting back at school the following Monday. However...
The Monday before this happened, I bought all of my books for schools because I had an overwhelming desire to get it off my To-Do list.
The day before it happened, Wednesday, I went to Wells Fargo to pull out my money order to pay the apartment complex.
The day it happened, Thursday, my parents got into town. It's awfully nice to have a police officer mom to go file police reports with you. Even more important, it was extraordinary to have them here to hug me and make everything seem maintainable.
Clearly, something was working my favor. Maybe it was God handing me a little to learn from. Maybe it was Karma... getting me back for doing something that wasn't quiiiiite so bad that I deserved a full punishment. Or maybe it was just chance. Whatever it was, I'm glad it was in my favor. (Thus far, my claims haven't closed yet.)

So back to life... school is school. Political Science is really interesting... just a lot of reading. Work is going REALLY well. At the office, I'm still loving every moment of it. It's super easy when you thoroughly enjoy the people you work with. From the people in my office that I see every day to my manager in CA. Everyone is just sooo easy to work with and so pleasant and, even more important, really respectful. Gammage hasn't been in action much lately. We don't have a show until late September. However, a week from Tuesday I will be getting my certification in CPR and AED, which is pretty cool. I'll definitely feel much more comfortable working with the large crowds we attract and in emergency situations.

Now I'm heading into Labor Day weekend. Tonight, I'm speaking at a fraternity rush event for AKPsi (yay being an alumnus). Then, FINALLY, I get some quality time with the boyfriend. More adventures to be told.

Random Thoughts.

2009-08-13T10:27:00.002-07:00

My friend Doug sent these to me. They were too absolutely hilarious not to share.
******************************
Random Thoughts of the Day:

I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid Ghetto" routing option.

More often than not, when someone is telling me a story all I can think about is that I can't wait for them to finish so that I can tell my own story that's not only better, but also more directly involves me.

Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.

I don't understand the purpose of the line, "I don't need to drink to have fun." Great, no one does. But why start a fire with flint and sticks when they've invented the lighter?

Have you ever been walking down the street and realized that you're going in the complete opposite direction of where you are supposed to be going? But instead of just turning a 180 and walking back in the direction from which you came, you have to first do something like check your watch or phone or make a grand arm gesture and mutter to yourself to ensure that no one in the surrounding area thinks you're crazy by randomly switching directions on the sidewalk.

That's enough, Nickelback.

I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.

The letters T and G are very close to each other on a keyboard. This recently became all too apparent to me and consequently I will never be ending a work email with the phrase "Regards" again.

Do you remember when you were a kid, playing Nintendo and it wouldn't work? You take the cartridge out, blow in it and that would magically fix the problem. Every kid in America did that, but how did we all know how to fix the problem? There was no internet or message boards or FAQ's. We just figured it out. Today's kids are soft.

There is a great need for sarcasm font.

Sometimes, I'll watch a movie that I watched when I was younger and suddenly realize I had no idea what the fuck was going on when I first saw it.

I think everyone has a movie that they love so much, it actually becomes stressful to watch it with other people. I'll end up wasting 90 minutes shiftily glancing around to confirm that everyone's laughing at the right parts, then making sure I laugh just a little bit harder (and a millisecond earlier) to prove that I'm still the only one who really, really gets it.

The other night I hit a new low at an open bar. I had already hopped on highway blackout when, inevitably I had to find a bathroom. Eventually I decided it was probably on the other side of the bar so I tried to walk over there, but ran into a guy coming the other way. We played that, Both go left, Both go right game to no avail, so I finally put out my hand to guide myself past and that's is when I realized, yup, that's a mirror I just tried to walk through. And the guy on the other side is me. Even cats can recognize their own image.

How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?

I would rather try to carry 10 plastic grocery bags in each hand than take 2 trips to bring my groceries in.

I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.

The only time I look forward to a red light is when I'm trying to finish a text.

A recent study has shown that playing beer pong contributes to the spread of mono and the flu. Yeah, if you suck at it.

Was learning cursive really necessary?

Lol has gone from meaning, "laugh out loud" to "I have nothing else to say".

I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.

Answering the same letter three times or more in a row on a Scantron test is absolutely petrifying.

My brother's Municipal League baseball team is named the Stepdads. Seeing as none of the guys on the team are actual stepdads, I inquired about the name. He explained, "Cuz we beat you, and you hate us." Classy, bro.

Whenever someone says "I'm not book smart, but I'm street smart", all I hear is "I'm not real smart, but I'm imaginary smart".

How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear what they said?

I love the sense of camaraderie when a n entire line of cars teams up to prevent a dick from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers!

Every time I have to spell a word over the phone using 'as in' examples, I will undoubtedly draw a blank and sound like a complete idiot. Today I had to spell my boss's last name to an attorney and said "Yes that's G as in...(10 second lapse)..ummm...Goonies"

What would happen if I hired two private investigators to follow each other?

While driving yesterday I saw a banana peel in the road and instinctively swerved to avoid it...thanks Mario Kart.

MapQuest really needs to start their directions on #5. Pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.

Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.

I find it hard to believe there are actually people who get in the shower first and THEN turn on the water.

Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty, and you can wear them forever.

I would like to officially coin the phrase 'catching the swine flu' to be used as a way to make fun of a friend for hooking up with an overweight woman. Example: "Dave caught the swine flu last night."

I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.

Bad decisions make good stories

Whenever I'm Facebook stalking someone and I find out that their profile is public I feel like a kid on Christmas morning who just got the Red Ryder BB gun that I always wanted. 546 pictures? Don't mind if I do!

Is it just me or do high school girls get sluttier & sluttier every year?

If Carmen San Diego and Waldo ever got together, their offspring would probably just be completely invisible.

Why is it that during an ice-breaker, when the whole room has to go around and say their name and where they are from, I get so incredibly nervous? Like I know my name, I know where I'm from, this shouldn't be a problem....

You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you've made up your mind that you just aren't doing anything productive for the rest of the day.

Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after DVDs? I don't want to have to restart my collection.

There's no worse feeling than that millisecond you're sure you are going to die after leaning your chair back a little too far.

I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten page research paper that I swear I did not make any changes to.

"Do not machine wash or tumble dry" means I will never wash this ever.

I hate being the one with the remote in a room full of people watching TV. There's so much pressure. 'I love this show, but will they judge me if I keep it on? I bet everyone is wishing we weren't watching this. It's only a matter of time before they all get up and leave the room. Will we still be friends after this?'

While watching the Olympics, I find myself cheering equally for China and USA. No, I am not of Chinese descent, but I am fairly certain that when Chinese athletes don't win, they are executed.

I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello? Damnit!), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to voicemail. What'd you do after I didn't answer? Drop the phone and run away?

I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.

When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.

I like all of the music in my iTunes, except when it's on shuffle, then I like about one in every fifteen songs in my iTunes.

Why is a school zone 20 mph? That seems like the optimal cruising speed for pedophiles...

As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.

Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.

It should probably be called Unplanned Parenthood.

I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.

I think that if, years down the road when I'm trying to have a kid, I find out that I'm sterile, most of my disappointment will stem from the fact that I was not aware of my condition in college.

Even if I knew your social security number, I wouldn't know what do to with it.

Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket, hitting the G-spot, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey - but I'd bet my ass everyone can find and push the Snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time every time...

My 4-year old son asked me in the car the other day "Dad what would happen if you ran over a ninja?" How the hell do I respond to that?

It really pisses me off when I want to read a story on CNN.com and the link takes me to a video instead of text.

I wonder if cops ever get pissed off at the fact that everyone they drive behind obeys the speed limit.

I think the freezer deserves a light as well.

I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lites than Kay.

The other night I ordered takeout, and when I looked in the bag, saw they had included four sets of plastic silverware. In other words, someone at the restaurant packed my order, took a second to think about it, and then estimate d that there must be at least four people eating to require such a large amount of food. Too bad I was eating by myself. There's nothing like being made to feel like a fat bastard before dinner.

London, England - May 14-17, 2009

2009-07-06T19:22:00.029-07:00

In London, we stayed at the Hootananny Hostel in Brixton, about a 15-minute Tube ride from Central London. Brixton was...interesting. To put it plainly, we witnessed a drug deal go down on the corner. Creepy, I know. Overall though, our experience in Brixton was nice. No one harassed us... a lady complimented me on the roundness of my booty (verbatim: “You have a very nice booty for a white girl... nice and round”)... and it was a pretty area.

*************************

Hootananny was an awesome place to stay. The entire ground-floor level of the building was a bar and music venue (Hostel Residents got a 20% discount at the bar). The second and third levels were the very cramped but comfortable rooms. We stayed in a 6 bed female dorm but only had one roommate for the duration of our leg in London. I was introduced to our roommate pretty awkwardly...

*************************

About 6am one morning, I awoke to what sounded like an elephant being dropped into the middle of the room. I rolled over very quickly in my top bunk bed to quite a vision. Our roommate, after getting tangled in her sheets, had fallen out of bed... and there she was... standing upright recovering from her falter...stark....ass....naked. I shielded my eyes quickly, waited for the sounds to settle and the door to close, indicating her departure and stretched over the edge of the bunk to see if Andria witnessed it as well. She wasn’t even there! Due to jetlag, Andria had been out of our room since 2 am and missed the entire event! We later learned our roommate’s name was Helana. She was a 46-year-old traveling massage therapist that was currently living in Hootananny. She ended up being a fabulous help when it came to things to see and do in London as well as a wealth of information regarding the culture of the UK. We got to share American information with her too... like the wisdom of “Family Guy” and “The Simpsons”.

*************************

I had a moment outside of Parliament... “This is where things got CRAZY.” Leave it to the American Revolution historian to having a touching moment there!

*************************

I had the best birthday known to all mankind. We went to St. Paul’s Cathedral, Tower of London, Tower Bridge and the Globe Theatre.

*************************

“Romeo and Juliet” at the Globe Theatre is, to date, my best theatre-going experience. Andria and I bought Yard Standing tickets, which meant we don’t have seats - we’re required to stand for the duration of the show. By the way, the show was three hours long! Despite the sore feet and backs...and the freezing cold... the show was amazing! We were in the second row of people standing – right up on the stage – which made the experience. I’ve always caught on to Shakespearean humor but I admittedly don’t think I ever truly “got it” until I saw it come to life on stage. The actors really embodied their characters and it made all the difference in the world to the reception of the show. It was as if I was seeing the show for the very first time. Not only was there lots of fun and drama, there was music and interaction. Multiple times the actors came out into the Yard Standing pit and played amongst the people. It truly was extraordinary.

*************************

London really was an amazing experience. The central portion of the city is much smaller than either of us imagined but being there touched me in a way that was larger than life. Overall, we didn’t get into too much trouble... we were saving that for Italy.

View My Pictures from London, England

My European Vacation

2009-07-06T18:44:00.003-07:00

I will be putting up bits and pieces of my European vacation on my blog over the next few days. So much happened over the 22 days I was gone there is no way I could do any of it proper justice by trying to describe it all. If you want to know more about one thing or another, please feel free to ask me questions.... or if you get a good laugh out of our shenanigans, feel free to make fun of me. It was an extraordinary experience... I hope it all translates. :)

Greg Pritchard - Britain's Got Talent - Show 5

2009-05-11T21:07:00.001-07:00

Absolutely awestruck. Ha.

Counting Down the Days...

2009-04-28T14:07:00.002-07:00

It's been quite a while since I've posted. Life has been consumed by lots of work and preparing for our Europa trip.

Work has been going really well. The theatre has provided a variety of shows and events to work, which I love. Just the other day I worked a kids' audition. It was fun to see all the kids nervous and jittery but so transformed when they stepped on the stage.

The "new" job is still amazing. Having a little bit more leeway and decision power makes the job more enjoyable, as well as my amazing co-workers.

I'm all set for school in the Fall. Not much else to worry about on that front.

And really... that's all. BF and I are doing well. BFF and I are doing well. Roomie and I are going bonkers waiting for the big day to come.

Two weeks, in case you were wondering...

As you can tell, it really has consumed my life.

But I feel obligated to post something fun so amuse yourself with this...
http://www.textsfromlastnight.com/

Op zoek naar Maria - Dans in het Centraal Station van Antwerpen

2009-04-01T17:43:00.001-07:00

Um... Awesome

"No cameras or recording devices!"

2009-03-23T11:58:00.006-07:00

When going to the theatre, at what point does it cross your mind that you should bring a camera? And for what purpose? Oh, you're going to take pictures of you and your girls near the poster in the lobby as a momento? Okay, fair enough. But if you plan on taking a camera for the purpose of sneaking pictures during the production, please think twice. If not for your guilty conscience, knowing you will be ruining the show for those around you, at least for the sake of your own dignity because I will, without remorse, embarrass you.

This weekend, "Rent" was in full force at our venue. People lined up at 5:30am to score those magical $20 front row seats for the 7:30pm performance and the mega-fans were out to play. Maybe all the excitement of getting the front seats and the fact that "Rent is actually HERE! WITH ADAM AND ANTHONY!" blinded one young lady from the numerous signs not only all over the lobbies but the massive one on stage stating the ever-important policy...

"No cameras or recording devices"

I didn't pin her as the type as I led her to her seats early because she was wobbling around on crutchs. She seemed like one who was just there to watch the show... a law-abiding citizen. Goodness! was I wrong.

After intermission, a stage manager reported that "a boy in a pink wig" in the front row was taking pictures. I poked my head in and couldn't find a boy in a pink wig. As I stepped out into the stairway to radio the other assistant to check his side and see if anyone fit that description, another stage manager came bolting out of backstage frantically saying "It's out now, it's out now!" I bolted in to find it was no boy - it was my crutches friend. All bets were off now. We were no longer friends.

I quickly scuttled my way into the front row and just as she was zipping back up her purse I held out my hand and said, "You can give me your camera now. You can get it back after the show." The girl's face went bright red and worried... people around her started looking and pointing... BUSTED!

I exited to the lobby to delete the pictures she had taken (it's all copyrighted material). She had taken 75 pictures!!! Crazy woman! It infuriated me so much that someone would take that many pictures during a show that I got her back in my own special way...

At the end of the show, I went down to the front of the theatre to meet up with her. I handed her back her crutches and then her camera. I gave her a brief lecture about taking photos inside a theatre during a production. She then flusteredly asked me if the pictures were still on the camera...to which I responded with "Absolutely not." As the tears began to flow and she attempted to verbally reprimand me for invading her privacy by going into her camera I explained to her that what she did was illegal and if she wished to continue to argue with me about it I could get DPS so they can explain to her federal copyright laws. Obviously, that was the end of our conversation.

As I left my ex-friend in tears with a "Have a nice day", in my head I giggled a little bit. You see, because I knew that when she flipped her camera to playback to check if I got aaall the pictures, which she would undoubtedly do... that little glimmer of hope would be shattered by the only picture I did leave. The picture I took of the sign in the lobby stating no cameras or recording devices were allowed inside the theatre.

Behind Adam Pascal's...Behind

2009-03-23T11:32:00.002-07:00

While working "Rent" this weekend, I got the rare opportunity to accompany my boss backstage to deliver items to the stage manager. We took the back way, passing all the dressing rooms, and, inevitably, the actors. Squeezing down the very narrow hallway jammed full of travel closets and tables, we approached Adam Pascal ("Roger") bent over a table signing posters. We edged by, each whispering an "excuse me" as we passed, and it occured to me how many girls would have loved to be in my position... squeeeezing past Adam Pascal's backside.
Yeah... eat it up, ladies. Haha.

Save the Duckies...

2009-03-23T11:27:00.003-07:00

Maybe this is common knowledge...
Maybe I'm behind the times...
But this made me very happy to learn today.

You no longer have to cut the six-pack plastic binders for soda cans. Nope... just throw them in the recycle bin. Yup, they're recyclable.

Yay for saving Duckies!

Oh Dear.

2009-03-12T12:17:00.001-07:00

This made me laugh out loud at work. Hilarious.
--Update to Come--

see more pwn and owned pictures

The Book List...

2009-02-19T16:18:00.002-07:00

Apparently the BBC thinks most people will have only read 6 of the 100 books here.
Instructions:

Look at the list and put an 'x' next those you have read.

x 1 Pride and Prejudice - Jane Austen
x 2 The Lord of the Rings - JRR Tolkien
x 3 Jane Eyre - Charlotte Bronte
x 4 Harry Potter series - JK Rowling
5 To Kill a Mockingbird - Harper Lee
x 6 The Bible
x 7 Wuthering Heights - Emily Bronte
x 8 Nineteen Eighty Four - George Orwell
9 His Dark Materials - Philip Pullman
x 10 Great Expectations - Charles Dickens
x 11 Little Women - Louisa M Alcott
12 Tess of the D’Urbervilles - Thomas Hardy
13 Catch 22 - Joseph Heller
14 Complete Works of Shakespeare
15 Rebecca - Daphne Du Maurier
x 16 The Hobbit - JRR Tolkien
17 Birdsong - Sebastian Faulks
x 18 Catcher in the Rye - JD Salinger
19 The Time Traveller’s Wife - Audrey Niffenegger
20 Middlemarch - George Eliot
21 Gone With The Wind - Margaret Mitchell
x 22 The Great Gatsby - F Scott Fitzgerald
23 Bleak House - Charles Dickens
24 War and Peace - Leo Tolstoy
25 The Hitch Hiker’s Guide to the Galaxy - Douglas Adams
26 Brideshead Revisited - Evelyn Waugh
27 Crime and Punishment - Fyodor Dostoyevsky
x 28 Grapes of Wrath - John Steinbeck
x 29 Alice in Wonderland - Lewis Carroll
30 The Wind in the Willows - Kenneth Grahame
x 31 Anna Karenina - Leo Tolstoy
32 David Copperfield - Charles Dickens
x 33 Chronicles of Narnia - CS Lewis
x 34 Emma - Jane Austen
x 35 Persuasion - Jane Austen
x 36 The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe - CS Lewis
37 The Kite Runner - Khaled Hosseini
38 Captain Corelli’s Mandolin - Louis De Berniere
x 39 Memoirs of a Geisha - Arthur Golden
x 40 Winnie the Pooh - AA Milne
x 41 Animal Farm - George Orwell
x 42 The Da Vinci Code - Dan Brown
x 43 One Hundred Years of Solitude - Gabriel Garcia Marquez
44 A Prayer for Owen Meaney - John Irving
45 The Woman in White - Wilkie Collins
x 46 Anne of Green Gables - LM Montgomery
47 Far From The Madding Crowd - Thomas Hardy
48 The Handmaid’s Tale - Margaret Atwood
x 49 Lord of the Flies - William Golding
x 50 Atonement - Ian McEwan
51 Life of Pi - Yann Martel
52 Dune - Frank Herbert
53 Cold Comfort Farm - Stella Gibbons
x 54 Sense and Sensibility - Jane Austen
55 A Suitable Boy - Vikram Seth
56 The Shadow of the Wind - Carlos Ruiz Zafon
x 57 A Tale Of Two Cities - Charles Dickens
x 58 Brave New World - Aldous Huxley
59 The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time - Mark Haddon
60 Love In The Time Of Cholera - Gabriel Garcia Marquez
x 61 Of Mice and Men - John Steinbeck
62 Lolita - Vladimir Naboko
63 The Secret History - Donna Tartt
64 The Lovely Bones - Alice Sebold X
x 65 Count of Monte Cristo - Alexandre Dumas
x 66 On The Road - Jack Kerouac
67 Jude the Obscure - Thomas Hardy
68 Bridget Jones’s Diary - Helen Fielding
69 Midnight’s Children - Salman Rushdie
x 70 Moby Dick - Herman Melville
x 71 Oliver Twist - Charles Dickens
x 72 Dracula - Bram Stoker
x 73 The Secret Garden - Frances Hodgson Burnett
74 Notes From A Small Island - Bill Bryson
75 Ulysses - James Joyce
76 The Bell Jar - Sylvia Plath
77 Swallows and Amazons - Arthur Ransome
78 Germinal - Emile Zola
79 Vanity Fair - William Makepeace Thackeray
80 Possession - AS Byatt
x 81 A Christmas Carol - Charles Dickens
82 Cloud Atlas - David Mitchell
x 83 The Color Purple - Alice Walker
84 The Remains of the Day - Kazuo Ishiguro
85 Madame Bovary - Gustave Flaubert
86 A Fine Balance - Rohinton Mistry
x 87 Charlotte’s Web - EB White
88 The Five People You Meet In Heaven - Mitch Albom
89 Adventures of Sherlock Holmes - Sir Arthur Conan Doyle
90 The Faraway Tree Collection - Enid Blyton
91 Heart of Darkness - Joseph Conrad
92 The Little Prince - Antoine De Saint-Exupery
93 The Wasp Factory - Iain Banks
x 94 Watership Down - Richard Adams
95 A Confederacy of Dunces - John Kennedy Toole
96 A Town Like Alice - Nevil Shute
x 97 The Three Musketeers - Alexandre Dumas
x 98 Hamlet - William Shakespeare
x 99 Charlie and the Chocolate Factory - Roald Dahl
x 100 Les Miserables - Victor Hugo

Seems that I have a few more to read but at least I passed the BBC's expectations. :)

**Thanks Jill.

Claim Check #459: Baby

2009-02-19T13:49:00.002-07:00

Last night I acted as House Manager for a symphony show and was presented with a truly unique situation. A baby was checked at the hatcheck. Yup, a baby. The parents checked the stroller and much to the surprise of the hatcheck assistant they left their baby in it. The hatcheck assistant didn't notice the small baby all bundled in white until the stroller started to cry. The two individuals working in that area couldn't remember what the parents looked like so they couldn't go get them... so what did they do? They babysat the kid. She cried... they strolled her around. Since when do we provide a babysitting service?!

Intermission came, the family grabbed the stroller, fed the baby, rolled it around. As intermission ended they started to roll the stroller over to the hatcheck and before we could comment to them "Sorry you can't leave your child here"... in very broken English they bolted away from the stroller yelling "Thank you.... one song more..." We went inside to find the parents that were lost in the crowd, gave up... continued caring for the baby. Once the piece was over, they came out, grabbed the stroller and left. As if it was the most natural thing to check your child.

So bizarre...

Probably should have called DPS.

*Sigh*

Always Celebrate Your Friend's Birthdays

2009-02-14T08:33:00.004-07:00

Happy AZ Statehood Day, everyone!!!

The good ol' state is 97 years old and still alive and kicking!

Her Morning Elegance / Oren Lavie

2009-02-05T18:57:00.001-07:00

Pretty creative video.

More Silver Lining.

2009-02-04T12:27:00.003-07:00

I'll admit it - I have an addiction to Vanity Fair magazine. The mix of politics, culture and fashion is precisely my cup of tea. If I had to pick a favorite article or segment in the magazine, without a millisecond of hesitation, I'd pick the Editor's Letter. I received my February 2009 issue, opened it straight to the Editor's Letter and in the end I was so pleased with the month's article that I felt the need to post it. The entire piece is pretty long-winded (read the whole letter here) so I've copy and pasted from VanityFair.com the section that I particularly liked. Please take a moment to enjoy.

"If this is the Second Great Depression, or the Great Retrenchment, or the Great Reckoning, or whatever it’s going to be called, there has to be a silver lining somewhere. Perhaps all those expensive educations and burning talents that wound up on Wall Street moving money around will be redirected to fields of endeavor with some tangible output. In the years between 1929 and 1939, creative talent in the U.S. flowered as in no other period of the last century. The 30s, a decade of devastating hardship for so many, was also the golden age of art, photography, theater, and film. In New York City alone the Empire State Building, the Chrysler Building, and Rockefeller Center were built during the 10 years beginning in 1929. The Museum of Modern Art, the Whitney, the Frick, and the Guggenheim all opened their doors during this period. And many of our great magazines, including Fortune, Life, Newsweek, and Esquire, were started during the decade. After the collapse of Wall Street in the 1920s, the culture stopped being all about money, and the country survived and ultimately flourished. Amid the wreckage we’ve created, America will most certainly rise again, and it might even be a better place to live and dream." - Graydon Carter, editor of Vanity Fair, February 2009.

Sore Loser Fail

2009-01-30T11:03:00.001-07:00

Aaaaaaaaaaahahahahahaha!!!

"I've Been Bamboozled!"/The Silver Lining

2009-01-28T19:00:00.006-07:00

Well, well, well... a return to the Banana on such a dramatic day...

If you so wish to continue on this post, make sure you're firmly strapped in with all limbs inside the vehicle... it's going to be a rollercoaster of a ride.

This morning I arose not so keen on my plans for the day. I had been set up with an interview at a company, my second of the week, and to be honest... I wasn't as thrilled for this one as the one I had attended yesterday. Oh man, that was only yesterday. Regardless, I put on my second-best "I'm completely employable" outfit and headed into Phoenix. When I got there I was directed to a small office off to the side of building. The nice lady greeted me at the door, shook my hand, and handed me three pieces of paper. The top two were the formal application - "Fill these out and let me know when you're done". The last one was the formal job description they had "forgotten" to send to me. My first impression was "Wow... this is an intense job description for a desk job..."

And then I see it...

Glaring in my face...

"Must know or be willing to learn how to operate a forklift."

A FORKLIFT?! What the hell kind of desk job requires you to use a forklift?! A mental image quickly pops in my head... me... on a large yellow forklift... twirling around in circles... weeeeeeeeeeeee.... then smashing into a large pile of what appears to be important boxes. No - no way could I be employed at a place that required me - scratch that- allowed me to operate a forklift. Do they know what kind of liability they would be taking on?! I can't snowboard without spraining my entire body or carry chairs without almost breaking my foot... let alone operate a forklift without causing a building to collapse.

I read through the rest of the description... purchase orders... inventory... currier services. This was no desk job... it's a warehouse job. So I stood up, very politely told the lady that I was under the wrong impression about the job, thanked her for her time and consideration but... I just didn't think this job was for me.

I had been so bamboozled!

I headed home... laughed my ass off... changed back into pajamas... hung out for a little while. Then it came... the dreaded email...

I had interviewed for a job yesterday morning that I really wanted - REALLY wanted. Unfortunately, there were a number of "very qualified candidates"... blah blah blah. I didn't get the job. I pouted. Yes, even cried a little. Responded with a very polite and professional email. And burrowed.

Yes, I burrowed in my bed. Like a toddler, I grabbed my stuffed monkey, pulled the covers over my head and cried. Yeah... it's as pathetic as you are imagining it in your head right now. After about 20 minutes... I started getting angry.

No, no. Not angry with the school - they just did what they felt was best fit for them. And no, not angry because I had somehow "blown the interview". Angry with me because... what the hell am I doing? Why am I applying for and stressing over full time jobs when I really want to go to Graduate School? IDIOT!

So... I unburrowed myself. Pulled out the very buried Grad School preparation file and went to work. How did I get so far from what I wanted to do? I'll tell you what it was... Student Loan Debt. F That. I'm going back to school.

Now I'm at work. Yes, still one of TWO. At least I have an income, right? I have a roof over my head, food on my plate and a kitty that loves me unconditionally. Eventually things will straighten out for me... but for now I need to stay on a straight path.

Absentee

2009-01-27T20:02:00.003-07:00

Have you been checking the Banana? Have you been greatly disappointed by the lack of posts?

My apologies. In fact, too much has been going on to write about but most of it with too little entertainment value.

Lion King is in town and feel as if it has consumed my life. My dreams rock out to "Hakuna Matata" (with some surprising subconscious effects) and I very frequently run out of black and white clothing. Regardless, I still love my job, the people I work with and the fact that it's definitely contributing to my Europa fund.

Other than that, I would love to report more but so much is in the air. So this will have to do for now. Hopefully I'll have exciting news before the week is out.

Until then....

Hakuna Matata

Gay Marriage Can Save the Economy!

2008-12-13T11:06:00.000-07:00

I'm sure many of you have seen this video but I love it so I'm posting it. Enjoy!

"Prop 8 - The Musical" starring Jack Black, John C. Reilly, and many more... by Jack Black

Marbles

2008-12-10T11:04:00.006-07:00

There's something to be said about independence. I'm not talking about the incomparable feeling of being at liberty to do what ever it is that tickles your fancy. I'm referring to the lack of dependence - on other people. More specifically, emotional independence.
There's something to be said about someone who has spent much of their adult life learning not to depend on other people. I'm not talking about the inability to trust others. I'm referring to the lack of relying on someone else for stability and sanity.
There's something to be said about having it together. I'm not talking about having life planned out. I'm referring to the ability to have nothing all put together and still be sane.

I have spent much of the past couples years conditioning myself to deal with life's hail storms solo. I've made a really strong attempt at keeping my head together and dealing with problems with grace. At times, it worked out in my favor - when it was all over with, I thought to myself, "Well done, Jen." However, it seems lately, more often than not, I think, "You're better than that." Having built an emotional cocoon inside of myself, I have spent the past few years striving to prove that I can, as I truly believe, handle it all myself.

This is not to imply that I don't talk to anyone about things that emotionally affect me. In fact, if you're reading this, you know for certain that I do. Nor is this to imply that it is a chore for me to share things that affect me or don't appreciate the time spent listening to me. I certainly appreciate it. A moment always comes to mind when I think of sharing a story with someone. That moment was when a friend told me, "You depend on me too much. You need me too much." That statement, which probably seemed so small to him at that time, has instilled in me a deliberate intention not to tell someone too much. That comment alone has scarred me. What this friend didn't understand was that I didn't need him at all. I share because I want to - not because I need to. I let people into my world because it's something I want to share with them - specifically. Some people are told stories and others are completely left out. But never is my intention to spread the burden. Everyone has heard me say, "I'm not looking for advice - I just needed to rant".

There's something to be said about independence - but lately, everything that could be said is not even remotely positive. There is a breaking point with people and I'm about two bad situations away from cracking. The events of the past week and half have sunk me into the most pathetic depressive state that even the most emo kids would be jealous of my dark mood. The incident at work (G) still has me rattled to the core. The memories won't leave my head and I'm still waking in the night from little terrors. Even more so, I'm filling the role of HM tonight... you can imagine the nervousness. My other place of employment has me so unhappy that I rarely feel fulfilled or even positive about myself while there or after I've left. I frequently think to myself, "What the hell am I doing here?" Then I'm forced to remember that rent must be paid and all those jobs I've applied to haven't even called me back for an interview. A week from Friday I graduate... well, kind of. I haven't completed my foreign language yet, so the relief that is commonly associated with graduation is completely lost. "The Girl with a Plan"... has no plan. A fact I was fine with until I realized that after New Year's I would have to return to a job situation that makes me miserable. Speaking of New Year's, I have the opportunity to take an amazing trip with my amazing boyfriend... issue: no amazing money to pay for it. In addition, I've had crippling knee problems over the past month that are getting exponentially worse - perfect conditions for snowboarding. On the topic of snowboarding, trip to see Warren Miller with best friend (maybe still?) turned out to be a complete disaster. This coming after getting in a fight with both my best friend for the first time ever (for an eight year friendship, that's pretty amazing) and undecided-situation best friend within 12 hours of each other. In addition to all of this, I attended my final fraternity meeting as a student brother - something I didn't think I would be too broken up about but I feel like I just had an appendage severed from my body. I've spent the last four and half years with my fraternal obligations involuntarily at the forefront of my mind - now it's entirely up to me to keep it there.

There really is something to be said about independence. All of this I keep on my shoulders. I don't seek to spread the burden because only I can do anything to make my life any easier. Please note that this doesn't even begin to touch on the outside influences of my life that I must also deal with. Even as I typed that I thought that this isn't to imply that my life is absolutely terrible either. I have my blessings. The point of all of this really is ask people to please consider before they ridicule, question, argue, blame or criticize to consider the situations of someone other than themselves. I am only one person and there is only so much I can do...there is only so much I can handle. Afterall, I've been conditioned to be emotionally independent.

Am I finally looking for advice? No. I just needed to rant.

Grab The Closest Book

2008-12-10T09:01:00.002-07:00

My China Friend posted this on Facebook as a status game, but I think it's fun... so I'm putting it on my blog.

* Grab the book closest to you. Now.
* Go to page 56.
* Find the 5th sentence.
* Write that sentence in a comment.
* Don't go looking for your favorite book, or the coolest one you have - just grab the closest one.

Mine:

"And yet," said Smee, "I have often heard you say that hook was worth a score of hands, for combing the hair and other homely uses."

The Plague of Finals...

2008-12-08T21:40:00.001-07:00

... I think I'm getting sick.

Newscast

2008-12-07T13:02:00.000-07:00

This was too funny not to repost.

There is a god...

2008-12-06T11:54:00.003-07:00

I don't know how many of you out there are as creeped out by Bratz dolls as I am... but I found reassurance that maybe... just maybe... these creepy-ass things will go away.

Don't mess with Barbie
Let's get something straight — Barbie may look like a bombshell, but she's no pushover. Mattel, the makers of the iconic doll, recently won a prolonged legal battle with MGA, the manufacturers of Bratz. The outcome of the legal battle puts into question the future of the creepy-looking Bratz figures. A federal court ruled that MGA was to be banned from making and selling "the saucy Barbie alternative." Why? Apparently, the court found that the creator of Bratz came up with the idea while working for Mattel. Hence, the idea belongs to the house that Barbie built.

http://buzz.yahoo.com/buzzlog/92080

I'll Admit It...

2008-12-05T22:49:00.001-07:00

This made me cry a little....

Happy Days: The Musical

2008-11-18T22:36:00.003-07:00

Roomie and I went to see "Happy Days: The Musical" tonight at Gammage. Being the bums that we are, we went using my Dollar Ticket perk (2 seats = $2). We arrived to find we were seated in Row 11, seats 34 & 36 (very good seats). Feeling pretty good about our location, we settled into our chairs and waited for the show to begin. The show was running a bit late... nothing new for an opening night though. Out of nowhere, Colleen (head of ASU Public Events) strolls on to stage with a microphone to announce that tonight's performance was to be a very important one. Not only was this performance the Opening Night for the national tour of "Happy Days" (pretty huge deal)... the writer of the tv series, Garry Marshall, was in the audience as well as two of its original actors. She pointed to the crowd to indicate the location of Anson Williams ("Potsie") and Don Most ("Ralph Malph"), which appeared to be behind roomie and me... directly behind us - literally. The infamous "Potsie" and "Ralph Malph" were... RIGHT THERE. Haha. Now I'm not a star struck person, but I grew up lying on my parents' bed watching "Happy Days" on Nick at Nite... and I looooved Potsie. So it was definitely a cool experience to listen to "Potsie" and "Ralph Malph" laugh throughout the performance and talk to us during intermission... all for $2.

And yes, we got autographs. :)

This Day in History: Closing of Ellis Island

2008-11-12T16:43:00.002-07:00

Every morning in my email box, I receive my personalize "This Day in History" from History.com - much to your surprise, I'm sure. I found today's headlining article particularly interesting and wanted to share.

****
November 12: General Interest

1954 : Ellis Island closes
On this day in 1954, Ellis Island, the gateway to America, shuts it doors after processing more than 12 million immigrants since opening in 1892. Today, an estimated 40 percent of all Americans can trace their roots through Ellis Island, located in New York Harbor off the New Jersey coast and named for merchant Samuel Ellis, who owned the land in the 1770s.

On January 2, 1892, 15-year-old Annie Moore, from Ireland, became the first person to pass through the newly opened Ellis Island, which President Benjamin Harrison designated as America's first federal immigration center in 1890. Before that time, the processing of immigrants had been handled by individual states.

Not all immigrants who sailed into New York had to go through Ellis Island. First- and second-class passengers submitted to a brief shipboard inspection and then disembarked at the piers in New York or New Jersey, where they passed through customs. People in third class, though, were transported to Ellis Island, where they underwent medical and legal inspections to ensure they didn't have a contagious disease or some condition that would make them a burden to the government. Only two percent of all immigrants were denied entrance into the U.S.

Immigration to Ellis Island peaked between 1892 and 1924, during which time the 3.3-acre island was enlarged with landfill (by the 1930s it reached its current 27.5-acre size) and additional buildings were constructed to handle the massive influx of immigrants. During the busiest year of operation, 1907, over 1 million people were processed at Ellis Island.

With America's entrance into World War I, immigration declined and Ellis Island was used as a detention center for suspected enemies. Following the war, Congress passed quota laws and the Immigration Act of 1924, which sharply reduced the number of newcomers allowed into the country and also enabled immigrants to be processed at U.S. consulates abroad. After 1924, Ellis Island switched from a processing center to serving other purposes, such as a detention and deportation center for illegal immigrants, a hospital for wounded soldiers during World War II and a Coast Guard training center. In November 1954, the last detainee, a Norwegian merchant seaman, was released and Ellis Island officially closed.

Beginning in 1984, Ellis Island underwent a $160 million renovation, the largest historic restoration project in U.S. history. In September 1990, the Ellis Island Immigration Museum opened to the public and today is visited by almost 2 million people each year.

***
You can receive your own "This Day in History" by following this link.

Because I'm Bored...

2008-11-10T21:37:00.002-07:00

Respond with your own answers if you're so inclined.

1)Three names you go by?
Jen
JBalls
Jenni (Don't even...reserved for family)

2) three things you are wearing right now?
Blue Jeans
My new Victoria Secret Boucle Sweater
Red Penguin Socks

3) Are you currently happy?
Ridiculously. Like... I wish everyone could feel the way I do.

4) Have you ever been given a rose
A couple of times... romantically and with some Brotherly love

5) Have you ever licked your foot?
Um... perhaps.

6) Have you ever been in love?
Certainly.

7) Do you believe that everyone has a soul-mate?
Yes. Simply, yes.

8) What's your current problem?
Trying to find a sweet full-time job.

9) Have you ever had your heart broken?
Yes...

10) Your thoughts of long distance relationships?
It's entirely doable.

11) Are you a loser?
I'm a winner at all things. Haha.

12) How many kids do you want to have?
To be determined.

13) What is/are your favorite colors?
Blue and green

14) Are you afraid to fall in love?
Absolutely not. Life's too short.

15) Have you ever found it hard to tell anyone you like them?
Who hasn't???

16) Imagine you're 40 & your spouse just died, would you get re-married?
Yes. I would still have over half my life to live... far too long to spend alone.

17)What age did you start noticing the opposite sex?
Probably about the 8th grade... I was far too nerdy and into school before that.

18) What song do you want played at your wedding?
Oh goodness... no idea. I mean, other than the "Cha-Cha Slide" :)

19) Do you love anyone?
Plenty of people... family and friends.

20) Do you think someone likes you?
Well I sure hope he still likes me... :P

21) If someone liked you, do you want them to tell you?
Only if it's my boyfriend.... or Ryan Lynch (kidding)

What Do You Make?

2008-11-04T12:30:00.002-07:00

More often than not when people ask me what my major is, they hear the word "History", cringe (perhaps due to horrible high school history class experiences) and say, "What are you going to do with that? Teach?" I'm never quite certain if that question is meant to sound as offensive as the tone usually lends to, however, I can see their point. Who wants to stand at the front of the room and instruct little s%#& for brains all day for minimal pay? Oh wait... I can't see their point - I do. I'm not sure why teaching has gotten such a bad rep. Most people tell me that it's how much teachers make. The average teacher in Arizona earns $38,000 a year (http://www.teachingtips.com/average-teacher-salaries/arizona/)but that is certainly not what teachers make. Below is a piece that was sent to me by a friend when I decided teaching is what I want to do for the rest of my life. Perhaps it can enlighten a few. Enjoy! :)

***

What Teachers Make, or
Objection Overruled, or
If things don't work out, you can always go to law school

By Taylor Mali
www.taylormali.com

He says the problem with teachers is, "What's a kid going to learn
from someone who decided his best option in life was to become a teacher?"
He reminds the other dinner guests that it's true what they say about
teachers:
Those who can, do; those who can't, teach.

I decide to bite my tongue instead of his
and resist the temptation to remind the other dinner guests
that it's also true what they say about lawyers.

Because we're eating, after all, and this is polite company.

"I mean, you¹re a teacher, Taylor," he says.
"Be honest. What do you make?"

And I wish he hadn't done that
(asked me to be honest)
because, you see, I have a policy
about honesty and ass-kicking:
if you ask for it, I have to let you have it.

You want to know what I make?

I make kids work harder than they ever thought they could.
I can make a C+ feel like a Congressional medal of honor
and an A- feel like a slap in the face.
How dare you waste my time with anything less than your very best.

I make kids sit through 40 minutes of study hall
in absolute silence. No, you may not work in groups.
No, you may not ask a question.
Why won't I let you get a drink of water?
Because you're not thirsty, you're bored, that's why.

I make parents tremble in fear when I call home:
I hope I haven't called at a bad time,
I just wanted to talk to you about something Billy said today.
Billy said, "Leave the kid alone. I still cry sometimes, don't you?"
And it was the noblest act of courage I have ever seen.

I make parents see their children for who they are
and what they can be.

You want to know what I make?

I make kids wonder,
I make them question.
I make them criticize.
I make them apologize and mean it.
I make them write, write, write.
And then I make them read.
I make them spell definitely beautiful, definitely beautiful, definitely
beautiful
over and over and over again until they will never misspell
either one of those words again.
I make them show all their work in math.
And hide it on their final drafts in English.
I make them understand that if you got this (brains)
then you follow this (heart) and if someone ever tries to judge you
by what you make, you give them this (the finger).

Let me break it down for you, so you know what I say is true:
I make a goddamn difference! What about you?

Pumpkin Carving!

2008-10-28T23:59:00.005-07:00

We had so much fun this year! They turned out REALLY good too. Check it out.

Ben's World, Andi's Indi, My Lock, Shock and Barrel, Chris's Skull and Swords

Andi's Indi

My Lock, Shock and Barrel

Discussing #2 with David Sedaris

2008-10-23T00:00:00.003-07:00

Yes, it's midnight. And yes, I'm blogging. And yes, I'm doing it from work... at Gammage.

Tonight, the infamous David Sedaris was scheduled to read pieces of his work on the Gammage stage. In true "star-status" style, he came bursting into the Stagedoor "office" (really more of a closet) less than 20 minutes before show time and I was surprised when he didn't just trot down the stairs to backstage like 90% of the actors who come here. Instead... he stopped, stared me straight in the face and in quite possibly the most inappropriately loud voice asked me, "Do you know what the expression 'dropping a duece' means?!" To which I responded, "Of course..."
"Does it really mean to deficate?!" he asked while making a squatting motion and a hand gesture near his rear. (Chris, I know you appreciate his word choice.)
"Yes, it means to take a 'Number 2' or a 'duece'."
"That is truly hilarious. Must be an Arizona thing."
Some witty banter about Arizonans followed, after which he proceded downstairs to take the stage.

This hilarious interaction has helped me over look the fact that his end of show book signing has kept me at Gammage to this ungodly hour.

Brett Favre = Benedict Arnold

2008-10-20T13:00:00.001-07:00

Mon Oct 20, 2008 11:45 am EDT

Report: Favre commits football treason, shares Packers' plans
By Chris Chase

Jay Glazer of FOX Sports reports that Brett Favre called the Detroit Lions earlier this year to give them a scouting report on his old team, the Green Bay Packers. Writes Glazer:
Several sources have told FOX Sports that Favre earlier this year phoned the Detroit Lions prior to their battle versus Favre's old team, the Green Bay Packers, and gave them a rundown of the nuances of what Green Bay does on offense. According to the sources, Favre actually spent over an hour on the phone with Lions coaches, who were connected with Favre by then-team president Matt Millen.

Favre has allegedly done this with a number of teams, but his chat with the Lions was more in-depth than any other, reports Glazer. Despite the Favrian tips, Detroit still lost that week 2 matchup, 48-25.

The hour long call to Detroit higher-ups came during the week Favre and the Jets were preparing for the Brady-less Patriots. Up until that point, Favre had played just one regular season game in New York. One can't help but think that the quarterback's time might have been better spent learning his new team's playbook instead of discussing his old team's playbook.

Such insider trading isn't against league rules; teams often sign players recently cut by an upcoming opponent in order to get some insight into formations and schemes. But for Favre to call up the Lions, apparently unsolicited, to divulge information comes across as petty. Although, petty as it may have been, I'm sure Brett Favre sold out his former club like a little kid having a lot of fun out there.

Into the Woods...

2008-10-07T21:17:00.006-07:00

Erin came out to visit me for Retreat this year. Brought back some memories....

Freshman Year Fall 2004:

Senior Year Fall 2008:

"What I Learned Yesterday" by Thomas Avery

2008-10-05T12:06:00.002-07:00

A good friend of mine posted this note on Facebook and has given me permission to share it. I hope you all enjoy it as much as I did.

********
What I learned yesterday.
October 4, 2008

As some of you all know I have become very involved in the Obama presidential campaign. Every Saturday and Sunday during the day I go door to door talking to voters, getting preferences, and registering unregistered voters. During the week I make phone calls and work in the office, doing what I can to get Barack Obama elected president. It was at one of the doors I got to that why I am doing this really struck home.

I went canvassing last night (the technical term for going door to door) and the last door I knocked on was occupied by a named Terry. The home was a nice, older style St. Louis house with the sort of landscaping that was once very well kept, but had since fallen into disrepair. Weeds were growing in the cracks of the cobblestone steps heading up to the house and had it not been for a light on in the upstairs I would have assumed nobody was home. As soon as the door opened out walked a middle aged man, seemingly a little leery of a stranger approaching his home at 7 o’clock on a Friday evening. I started my usual shtick of introducing myself, and telling him why I was at his door, to find out who he was voting for and what issues he cared about. I expected the worst, he scanned me with a very skeptical look and he looked deep in thought. I assumed coming was some snide remark about how John McCain was our only choice or some falsehood about Obama and his upbringing. Instead Terry was looking for the right words to express how much we need Obama to be elected president. He told a story about how he was a foreman for a plant in St. Louis for 25 years. He was a proud man who worked hard and took care of his elderly parents who lived with him. At least he could until 3 years ago, when he suffered a brain injury which now impedes his ability to talk clearly and adversely affected his motor skills. He still takes care of his parents, living off of aid from the government and money he had saved while he was working. He talked for a long time, clearly nobody had taken the time to hear his story, at least nobody recently. He is an American, forgotten.

People like John McCain and the republicans tout how big a problem government is. They say we need to eliminate programs all together and come up with private solutions for all aspects of life. What a load of garbage. We live in the greatest country on earth yet we have people who have done nothing wrong, who have worked hard and are proud Americans struggling to pay their utility bills. We have more wealth that any other nation has, yet we insist that people like Terry are “burdens of the state”, and that a free markets can provide the answers to every question. Well let me ask you, if we don’t take care of people like him what good is one dollar of that wealth? Our country wasn’t founded because we wanted no government at all, it was founded because we wanted a government that represented all Americans. This is what Barack Obama supports. Right now we have a government that only represents the very rich. If you don’t have wealth, you have no influence. This isn’t class warfare, but it is undeniable that we have a tax code that so highly favors the top one half of one percent that we now have the highest disparity between the haves and the have-nots in America since the 1920s. Republicans call Obama a “socialist” and say he wants big government to run our lives. Nonsense, he wants a government that works, that cares for veterans and people who have lived their lives in ways that have benefited our nation. We need change in our nation and we need it badly. The only way the other side can win this election is if they drive a wedge between the American people. They want to make us scared of Barack Obama and scared of each other. While I hate to see how much of my money goes to taxes each paycheck, I know that because I don’t make $250,000 a year yet, under an Obama administration my taxes would actually go down. If I did make over $250,000 my taxes would go to what they were under Bill Clinton, a time of great economic prosperity in our country. This isn’t some massive tax hike, it’s a changing of the tax code to make it more fair to the middle class, to give them a chance to make it in America.

A sign on Terry’s door warned against having an open flame because Oxygen was in use in the house. He told me not to worry, and his mother puts it on when she sleeps and that it was off during the day. His nonchalance about something as serious about his mother requiring oxygen was so striking to me. Few things I have gone though in my life could nearly be as challenging as the daily struggle that he goes though each day to make ends meet.

Every presidential candidate tells stories about voters they meet and the hardships they face. It always struck me as incredibly insincere, how could someone running for the highest office in America really care about the concerns of one person? Well yesterday I learned it does. Our country is better than this and our nation needs people like us to step up and get it done.

Thank you to everyone who read this. If you want to get involved let me know. I can get you set up right way.

Best,
Thomas

"The Nightmare Before Christmas" Covers

2008-09-30T09:57:00.002-07:00

I recently purchased the extended soundtrack for Tim Burton's "The Nightmare Before Christmas on iTunes. To my surprise, not only does the soundtrack include every song from the movie, but also 5 covers performed by Marilyn Manson, Fiona Apple, Panic at the Disco, Fall Out Boy and She Wants Revenge. Some magical YouTuber has put two of the songs to film clips online. I have included them for your enjoyment. :)

Don't Look Back in Anger

2008-09-30T09:53:00.000-07:00

Big Day

2008-09-29T18:03:00.003-07:00

Roommate and I purchased our tickets to London for our trip to Europe today!!! We will be gone for three weeks enjoying the glory of London, Paris and Rome at the start of next summer. More information to come... just wanted to share the joy! :)

Just for Aubrie

2008-09-29T09:18:00.001-07:00

Random Acts of Kindness

2008-09-05T13:27:00.002-07:00

While enjoying lunch at Red Robin today, Roommate and I found ourselves crammed into a side table for two with a rowdy foursome of businessmen next to us. We attempted to carry on a conversation amongst ourselves but the boisterous older men were overpowering our conversation. As our waiter walked by, the gentleman sitting next to me loudly shouted out to him, "HEY! Come here a second!... See those three military people over there... I want to pay their bill." Assuming the man knew them, I didn't pay much attention to what he was doing. The waiter and Manager retrieved the bill, the man paid and as the military personnel were leaving, each one stopped by and shook the man's hand. To everyone of them, the man said, "Thank you so much for your service," to which each solider responded with a surprised and endearing smile. After they had all come by to say 'Thank you', the man sat down and responded to his companions' inquiring faces with, "It was the least I could do... they're serving our country."

Great 'Family' Quote

2008-06-15T09:22:00.002-07:00

"Families are webs. Impossible to touch one part of it without setting the rest vibrating. Impossible to understand one part without having a sense of the whole."

The Thirteenth Tale by Diane Setterfield (pg. 58)

Meet Maggie

2008-06-12T22:06:00.005-07:00

Perhaps one of the most random things I've done in recent months, today, I adopted a kitten. My mom and I went to PetSmart to get some water conditioner for Phillipe (my beta). As I browsed the aisles I came across the Cat Adoption display. I walked up and a black and brown tabby cat named "Susie" approached the glass. Never being one for cats, I was surprised that I was so taken by her adorable face. I put my finger upon the glass... she laid her paw on my finger... and it was love at first sight. Within 20 minutes, I had signed the papers, we had purchased WAY too much kitty stuff, and "Susie" had officially become "Maggie". She is the most spoiled pet we have had in our family, with her own special bed, scratching lounger and... wait for it... Caribbean Cruiser playhouse (Mom went a little overboard with that one, excuse the pun). However, she has such a precious personality - feisty and bouncy one minute, composed and cuddly the next. Plus she's just adorable. I've never been a cat person... but Maggie may have convinced me to be one for a little while.

I Love Duran Duran Videos

2008-06-11T16:52:00.002-07:00

Los Nombres de Jennifer

2008-06-09T16:01:00.000-07:00

I got really bored at work today and pulled this off of myspace. I think it's funny. If you do it in your head and have some funny results, please, by all means, post.

COUNTRY WESTERN SINGER NAME: (father & mother's middle names)
Carol Michael

NASCAR NAME: (first name of your mother’s dad, father’s dad)
John Joseph ... Hahahaha... that sounds so hick.

STAR WARS NAME: (the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 letters of your first name)
Balje

DETECTIVE NAME: (favorite color, favorite animal)
Green Otter.... sooooooo sneaky

SOAP OPERA NAME: (middle name, city where you were born)
Elizabeth Anaheim... hot.

SUPERHERO NAME: (2nd fav color, fav drink, add "THE" to the beginning)
The Blue Apple Juice... what?

FLY NAME: (first 2 letters of 1st name, last 2 letters of your last name)
Jeea ... sure.

GANGSTA NAME: ( fav ice cream flavor, fav cookie)
French Vanilla Nilla Wafer.... editted: French 'Nilla

ROCK STAR NAME: (a pets name, current street name)
Phillipe Gilbert

STRIPPER NAME: (name of your fav perfume/cologne, fav candy)
Heavenly Gummy Bear. Hahahahahaha

Panda Sneezing Fit

2008-05-24T09:30:00.001-07:00

I wish I was this cute when I sneeze uncontrollably.

Fabulous Birthday

2008-05-20T10:07:00.026-07:00

It's been said that every birthday after your 21st is kind of a downer. And if you think about it, there is some truth in that statement. What do you really have to look forward to after your 21st?... your 25th so you can finally rent a car?! Well, in an effort to keep our birthdays exciting post-legal drinking age, my roommate and I vowed to make a huge deal out of our 22nd birthdays. Most of you will remember the full California adventure I took my roommate on, including a trip to Oceanside to see some family and 16 hours at Disneyland checking off "22 Cool Things to do on the 22nd of September for her 22nd Birthday". Well, roomie came back and made my 22nd birthday just as magical... and ridiculously relaxing...

I woke up on May 16th with my roommate sitting on the side of the bed and her bf crawled into bed with me. After a few "Good Mornings" and "Happy Birthdays", she informed me that when I decided to get out of bed I was to walk straight to her bedroom. Following directions, I got up, walked to her room, and she had her massage table all set up... I received a 50 minute full-body massage to the sounds of Pride and Prejudice (one of my favorite movies). After awaking from my post-fabulous-massage daze, I walked into the living room to find it completely decorated by roomie's bf with streamers, balloons, and my very own "Happy Birthday" sign. Feeling a little slimey from the massage lotion, I jumped in the shower and emerged to the smell of french toast and eggs being made in the kitchen. Roomie and R. bf had prepared me a Birthday Breakfast fit for a princess. The rest of the day was spent shopping and by the pool with our two friends from downstairs.

The big event for my birthday was attending the ASU vs. University of Washington baseball game. Roomie, R. bf and a friend from high school escorted me to this complete blow out - Devils laid the smack down. After the game, we returned home where I laid the smack down in Trivial Pursuit Pop Culture Edition.

Saturday, roomie, roomie bf, three friends and I went to one of my closest guy friends' house to do some swimming and relaxing. I used to live at this house and it was nice to go back and just hang out. Aside from one of my guy friends trying to abuse me in the pool (wink-wink), it was extremely relaxing. I'm so happy Arizona finally has weather that is pool friendly.

That night we cleaned ourselves up and went to a restaurant near the Chinese Cultural Center of Phoenix called The Golden Buddha. The company, myself included, were completely fascinated by the extraordinarily large glass Lazy-Susan that occupied about 75% of our table. Dinner conversation was lively and at times severely inappropriate by the standards of Ms. Manners... but it made me realize how much I'm going to miss the group of guys that I've spent much of my college career with.

The night was really icing on the cake. We decided wasting a few more hours of our time on Mill Ave. wouldn't hurt and shooting pool was really on my radar - to Cue Club. I couldn't believe how many of my friends decided to join me on my continued birthday celebration. Being able to see old friends and new friends - old fraternity brothers, high school friends, and new fraternity brothers all in one big mix. Completely unbelievable.

For Sunday, we went to one of my favorite places in the world - The Grand Canyon. Roomie, R. bf and a good friend of ours took a day trip leaving at 6:30am and arriving home about 7pm. We drove straight to the Canyon, spent hours walking along the rim (roomie and I being trailblazers and getting yelled at by the guys for getting too close to dangerous edges), drove back down into Flagstaff to eat at our favorite pizzeria Alpine Pizza, and made the trek home.

By the end of the weekend, I was exhausted, sunburned... and ridiculously happy. This was by far the best birthday I've ever had, being able to see most of my favorite people in the world and do the things I enjoy the most. Thank you to everyone for the good times. Until next time... :)

Banana Has Moved!

2008-05-17T11:22:00.003-07:00

Jen's Banana has officially moved. My last hosting site was a little too "technologically advanced" for me (surprised, I'm sure) and it was frustrating trying to upload things. Being attached to Google also makes my life infinitely easier, as I'm sure you're all aware - Google is taking over my life.

This is my attempt at keeping my family and friends updated on my life as well as providing a venue for my ridiculousness. Enjoy!